| Category | Quote | E-Mail this quote | | Belief | Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
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| Common Sense | Time is what the Universe gave us to keep everything from happening all at once.
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| Freedom | Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?
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| Hell | I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that a PART of hell will break loose... it'll be much harder to detect.
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| Religion, Authority | I have the same authority as the Pope. I just don't have the same number of people who believe me.
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| Weather | Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
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